What it says above.

Click on the link above for a brief history of the best club in Wales and East
Sri Lanka.

2001/2002 fixture list. Before agreeing to going to Uncle Bill's swinging party in West Cross, consult this page to ensure the mighty Swans aren't playing.

Results / Reports
This is where you will find reports of matchdays and occasions reports of the match itself and the results.

Pub Guide
Probably the most accurate and well researched section of this site. Click here for a guide to all the worst pubs in the Vetch proximetry.

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All manner of shit that doesn't fit into any of the sections above.


Monday October 28th 2002 - The Kreator gig
Not sure why this is in the Swans section of the site really but today will be a day long remembered for many thous...well about 82 Swansea Jacks as today was the day that epic German metal outfit Kreator came town and stormed the Patti.

Unfortunately by the time Kreator hid the stage at 10.30 me and the Outlaw had enough and decided to go. This is decision which I know regret as apparently shortly after we left the General Bob Slipon Zod was ejected by security for stage diving.

The General in his mail below is quite annoyed over this treatment but I think he is lucky really to not end up in the coed. Let's look at the evidence:

1. He paid £11 to gain entry to the gig
2. He bought 2 t-shirts and a cd when inside at a cost of around £40
3. He is over 17st and attempted to stage dive in an empty arena where the majority of the people in there were under 10st (2st of that being hair)

> > > I got chucked out of the Kreator gig for stagediving by the way :o) so
> > > missed half their set, and i was so drunk i dont remember the first
> half
> > > of their set. All in all it was a pretty disappointing gig, what with
> > > Destructuon not there and only seeing half the Kreator set.

> > LOL stagediving? into what? there was hardly anyone there. i've got some
> > class pics from the gig which i will be putting up on the site
> hopefully.
> > you were in your element in there starpon, i have never seen you speak
> to so
> > many random people! were they all kiwi werewolfs or something? so what
> did
> > the bouncers say to you when chucking you out?

> Most people went down the fron when Kreator came on, so there were 5 or 6
> rows of people right fown tye front.
> They were just going on about health and safety and they dont allow it in
> case you land on someone and hurth them.
> What a bunch of fucking amaterus, that is an integral part odf metal
> concerts. The security firm clearly didnt have a clue about metal fans and
> what was the norm. I was pretty pissed off to say the least but they wold
> allow me badk in. Ther were quite a few others they chucked out as well.
> They even admitted they should have put a barrier down the front between
> the band and the crowd. At leastr they will not make the same mistake next
> time.

Fuck Madison Square Gardens! This is the Patti Pavilion and yes it has a fucking garden too!

Whilst in the area we thought it only right to stage a military coupe of the Guildhall but unfortunately the door was locked

Fuck Donnington! This is the Patti - Metal at it's best!

The look on the security blokes face says it all

The Muppet Show provided the entertainment between bands. Suprisingly nobody used the vantage point to fall to their deaths at any point during the evening

God Bless Satan - This t-shirt is a best seller in Vatican City

Themost amazing site of the night - Slipon spending money

Blending in nicely with the surroundings us

The gig had it all, even another General in the audience

Slipon surrounded by werewolfs and deafened by excessively loud crap but in his element nontheless